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Bernie Mac (1957-2008)
Died Saturday from — wait for it — pneumonia. How the hell does a millionaire die from pneumonia? At first I was a bit perplexed, but then I read that he suffered from some disease that severely affects his immune system. Tough break, man (respectfully).
Isaac Hayes (1942-2008)
He was found passed out near his treadmill. He died an hour later at Baptist East Hospital in Memphis.
Okay… let’s now add to this the long list of celebrity deaths this year:
Heath Ledger
Tim Russert
Charlton Heston
Bill O’Reilly (Okay, wishful thinking)
Sydney Pollack
Harvey Korman
George Carlin
…and those are only a few. What is going on here? I understand that death is a normal and inevitable part of one’s life, and that celebrities, though ridiculously wealthy, also must kick the bucket… but why are so many of them dying this year? I can’t recall ever seeing so many famous names pop up online with that dismal (19##-2008) following them. Do the celebrities know something that we don’t know? Are they cashing in their chips to go meet up with good ‘ole L. Ron Hubbard for a reason? Oh my God, is something really devastating about to happen to us all? Whoa, hold on a sec… are the terrorists going to attack again?! Is that what it is?! THAT’S WHAT IT IS ISN’T IT! HOLY CRAP… HOW DID THEY KNOW?!
*off to the bathroom with straight-edge in hand
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